Gratis bloggen bei

it feels like waking up from a weird dream...put 50 people in one house and see what happens. I suddenly realize we hadnt anything in common was just that situation but all the time I couldnt quite get rid of this feeling that I knew absolutely nothing about you...trying to give this feeling something real Im writing this. I got the impression that in the end I was pretty right. You didnt care and you even admitted it...maybe you were playing pretty much your own game we knew nothing about at all.
22.10.10 17:19

It's humbling and frustrating to realize how fragile life really is. And the realization how useless and powerless we are when faced with it.

Born to die before even living, no chances of ever living... But sometimes nature's cruel like that.. can't wrap my head around it, my mind rejects the mere thought of accepting it as a fact.

It's everywhere but it won't sink in.

Still a week from home and where there once was something there now is nothing.

Reality calls for a check, still  feel like the last weeks have been a blur and didn't really happen. Maybe I'll wake up.

Suspicions are I won't.

I'll keep on being one of the girls randomly changing the subject sharing fags and pouring the drinks, waiting for time to come and clean up this mess.

I'm being selfish but time should hurry up because the mess is getting too big. And normal although there in pretense seems so out of reach I'm begining to question it's existence.


18.9.10 16:23

Dieses Gefühl der Sicherheit, darauf sich auf etwas verlassen zu können, vielleicht kann das diese Stadt endlich erfüllen. Obwohl das Gerüst der Schule weggefallen, oder vielleicht auch gerade deshalb, ist alles soviel leichter und entspannter und angenehmer. Soziale Kontakte und Zukunftspläne tragen nun, und sie tragen besser und geben viel mehr raum für einen klaren blick über die gipfel.

der weg war hart und steine gab es bei gott genug. es ist nicht mehr vergleichbar und es ist alles besser geworden, thank god for that. im rückblick manchmal bedauern über das was hätte sein können, was war und doch die alles überstrahlende hoffnung der gegenwart und zukunft.

20.8.10 23:16

the bounds r strong nd luckily in the end i didnt disappoint myself. i didnt wanna listen to my instinct - bcoz i wanted to happen this so badly - somehow. but i actually knew all along what i had to do.
24.3.10 22:50

how selfish do we have to be? How much can we hurt others to get out the best for ourselves? I knew what I was doing. And I proably would do it again. But I have to stand on my side. I need to do whats important for me right now  - even if it means to be selfish. I need to take myself serious.
22.3.10 12:22

am ende gewinnt das bessere arschloch.
15.3.10 22:46

here we go...

one day the problem was lying around...saying nothing in particular, just hanging around, just summing a soft melody.

but it kept coming back. And this went on until I finally decided to talk to the problem. We had long chats. About nothing and everything. 

And one day the problem had gone, had gone visit somebody else and it wouldnt come back.

It was that day that I started having a happy and peaceful life. But - I needed the problem to come thus far.

10.2.10 22:40

[erste Seite] [eine Seite zurück]  [eine Seite weiter]

Verantwortlich für die Inhalte ist der Autor. Dein kostenloses Blog bei! Datenschutzerklärung