It's humbling and frustrating to realize how fragile life really is. And the realization how useless and powerless we are when faced with it.
Born to die before even living, no chances of ever living... But sometimes nature's cruel like that.. can't wrap my head around it, my mind rejects the mere thought of accepting it as a fact.
It's everywhere but it won't sink in.
Still a week from home and where there once was something there now is nothing.
Reality calls for a check, still feel like the last weeks have been a blur and didn't really happen. Maybe I'll wake up.
Suspicions are I won't.
I'll keep on being one of the girls randomly changing the subject sharing fags and pouring the drinks, waiting for time to come and clean up this mess.
I'm being selfish but time should hurry up because the mess is getting too big. And normal although there in pretense seems so out of reach I'm begining to question it's existence.